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About Literature / Student Tx0xMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 4 Years
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The word if is such a small word but it means a lot. There are many ifs in this world.
If I wasn't adopted...
Would I every be with someone else?
Or would end up on the streets?
If the Angel wasn't in Budapest...
Would I still make it to the states?
Or would I be trapped in a country where I didn't speak their language?
If they never touched me...
Would be still be scared of males?
Or would I get along with them more?
If I never discover the guest room...
Would I still be male?
Or not so much?
If we never moved to the mountains...
Would I still be with the friends I had?
Or would everyone disappear as always?
If I grew up...
Would I have the heart for others?
Or would I be snob like most of the people I grew up with?
If I said yes to him...
Would I still be with him?
Or would have my fear of males destroy things?
If they stopped yelling at me...
Would I have never started cutting?
Or would have something else made it worse?
If I was born what I am now...
Would I have gained her trust l
:icontx0x:Tx0x 0 3
Vday 2017 :icontx0x:Tx0x 2 0 Share another walk? :icontx0x:Tx0x 5 14 Little joys :icontx0x:Tx0x 3 3 Splash of color :icontx0x:Tx0x 3 0 Welcome to 2017 :icontx0x:Tx0x 1 3 Chloe Cosplay :icontx0x:Tx0x 1 3 Harley (Harvey) Quinn Genderbend :icontx0x:Tx0x 2 11 BB and Raven :icontx0x:Tx0x 4 6
Sometimes cuts don't touch skin. 
They skip to the heart, and feelings within.
You can't help but make mistakes.
To move on you do whatever it takes.
Time cannot wait for you.
Love isn't always kind, even if it is true. 
Stand up and face the choice ahead.
Or wait and wonder 'till you're dead.
Sometime you make efforts to make, or at least try, to make things right.
But it feels like it's a one way conversation.
You are not trying to make things worse, but somehow it ends up from good to bad to worse.
Words with letters don't always make any difference what's so ever. Sometimes you can misunderstand what people are saying.
Communication with face to face I think is the way to go.
You can understand more than you are willing to listen.
I hope you will listen.
I hope I can at least restart everything.
To forget everything as if it didn't happen. To reset the clocks back to the first conversation: "You have an awesome name btw" is how I started it...
Back to July 24th when this
:icontx0x:Tx0x 2 9
Jamison. :icontx0x:Tx0x 2 0
Deeper than the skin
Secrets. Every one has them. Some small
Some big.
Some so dark that you only darn trust your closest friends.
Some people are good at keeping them.
Some don't care and spread it like wildfire.
Some will accept you and your flaws.
Other will leave your life cause they say it isn't right.
I've had to experience this with family and friends.
Didn't think it would really happen.
But the looks aren't friendly and almost ghost like.
What can you do? Keep moving forward and not look back to the person you use to be.
Sometimes cuts don't touch skin.
They skip to the heart, and feelings within.
You can't help but make mistakes.
To move on you do whatever it takes.
Time cannot wait for you.
Love isn't always kind, even if it is true.
Stand up and face the choice ahead.
Or wait and wonder 'till you're dead.
:icontx0x:Tx0x 4 10
Thalia :icontx0x:Tx0x 4 3 Piper :icontx0x:Tx0x 2 0 Teo the Leo :icontx0x:Tx0x 4 0
Not much to say.
Things didn't work as they should
like most of the time when it comes to relationships.
Tears were shed.
But then the night still ended with a sweet farewell kiss.
I know things won't change mainly for me and this girl.
We still will be our little fun random musical theater nerds.
Wish this gal and I could be someone more but I'm still glad that I ment my female twin to match my energetic young male self. :j
:icontx0x:Tx0x 1 0


Suicidal :icondestinyblue:DestinyBlue 6,440 817 Supergirl :iconalex-malveda:alex-malveda 687 13 Inktober #10 A wonderful bundle of joy :iconoshiek:OshieK 18 28 Inktober #7 Staring at the moon :iconoshiek:OshieK 26 24
i. I like the way you call me
and always hang up on the second ring
because you know I get the shakes and the shivers
and sometimes, but not always, my knees fall off
and I have to crouch down to find them.
ii. I keep thinking about you.
and your ten-thousand tans
and your lack-luster smile
gaping open with colloquialisms.
You and the way you say
"you're pretty and thin"
as if one more label will be the gunshot
and I'll finally escape that dream
in which I'm running, but my feet are melting
through the sidewalk and my arms are
casting impossible shadows.
iii. It reminds me of how inarticulate words are sometimes;
how they flit through me every second and yet
I tend not to write them down around you
because, every time, I wake up and
forget why I am.
How your words mean next-to-nothing to me
because you throw them around
like ping-pong balls, and
I prefer to sip them like sweet tea.
iv. You say things like "I love you" and
it reminds me of how I will never be anyone.
How I me
:iconsense-and-stupidity:sense-and-stupidity 27 20
over and over, with nothing to stop it
have you ever closed your eyes
for a few minutes, and then opened them really fast and kind of sat there -
mildly amazed by how everything seemed
crisper, and brighter, like it felt right?
like the stars had aligned to make sure
this is how it was meant to be?
like it could never be anything different?
i didn't have to close my eyes
when i was with her.
she was the deep blue sea and the devil,
never anything in between.
she left every worry she had in the closet
and made me put them on the highest shelves,
the ones she couldn't quite reach.
she was a California sunset in November.
she was warm breeze and the worst taste in movies.
she was kisses when i felt like shit
and kisses when i couldn't admit i needed them.
i didn't want to call her an angel
but she was something good.
and yet despite all that we were nothing special.
like all things in the world, it ended.
she was cold at night
and i didn't know how to apologize.
we cut chunks of ourselves and called them
but it only
:iconterribly-forgotten:terribly-forgotten 5 0
All Wrong :icondestinyblue:DestinyBlue 10,404 505
the politics of emotion
unzip my spine
turn my skin inside out
and burn everything it houses.
I'm sick to death of the casualties of my mistakes,
my chronic failures like a fire burning down
those I love most.
break the record
I don't want to keep replaying
these old patterns.
look me in the eye
and tell me I'm not the common denominator
of all the times something broke.
I want to see you try to lie
don't patronize me,
if this was the test
I've failed it again.
I'm not sure I believe in
starting again anymore-
I'm too tired to get up again
purity is too far out of my grasping hands.
:iconarabesque-o:arabesque-o 4 1
Heart of Stone :iconmandapanda95:mandapanda95 3 0 It's that time of year again :iconthefrickenworst:thefrickenworst 2 1 ID 001 :iconthefrickenworst:thefrickenworst 4 1
on throwing punches with yourself
you strange human,
you child hearted explore.
you mischievous ear-poker.
you are so full of life, but your heart is the bathtub you keep draining.
they say 60% of the human body is made up of water,
and by that I mean maybe you don't need to be so afraid of drowning
because maybe you were made with water
in you to learn how to feel at home with it.
I hope you feel at home with it.
your body I mean,
I hope you feel at home in it-
because I know the way sometimes skin doesn't fit right over bones
and the way your head can feel like a gut-punch
or the crawl space in an attic
or an old record set on repeat.
remember to listen for who you are
in the heartbeat of God,
to look for it in the stutter of your own chest,
to hold to your identity with white knuckles
but an open heart,
and I will do my best to always mirror back truth.
:iconarabesque-o:arabesque-o 4 3
I Am Done
Love has been a battlefield for me
But I keep moving forward.
My time has run out
And I am standing on my own.
I let everyone I ever cared about
Get the best of me
But not this time.
I am done with trying
To please people
And today I finally
Started living for myself.
I am done trying to be
Someone that I am not
And I am done trying to please
This is my life and I will
Live it the way that I want to
So that is why I am done with you.
By: AngelofLight03
:iconangeloflight03:AngelofLight03 2 14
Don't be scared..I am here with you :iconkawacy:kawacy 13,814 995
Mature content
Untitled :iconsense-and-stupidity:sense-and-stupidity 7 0
a letter to myself.
I'm tired of this always-trying-to-fit,
this eternal strive to be funnier more energetic more likeable
like being around my friends is just another performance.
as if every time I open my mouth
I'm really just trying to run faster than the dark in my head-
terrified if I stop long enough it will shut me down.
I found myself only to lose who I am
in the projection of my own voice.
stop trying so hard.
let the words come when they will,
but do not apologize when silence fills your mouth
unique does not simply mean carbon copy yourself
a different version of someone else
you are not meant to be a circus act to meet with their approval.
self-acceptance does not start in their opinion of you.
it starts when you can look yourself in the eye
and love yourself genuinely,despite your faults.
bury the mindset that seeks to compete,
to fit into a mold.
you are the free fall of a bungee jump,
there is punch in your rebound
you are the first flight to the moon,
a canyon carving its own majestic pat
:iconarabesque-o:arabesque-o 6 0


Love hurts
Family lies
Friends cry
People die
Parents yell
You always try
You're never good enough and
you don't know why.
All you get is unacceptance


Tx0x's Profile Picture

Artist | Student | Literature
United States
Hi my name is Teo

I'm from Bulgarian and loves adventure. I enjoy longboarding, listening to music, drawing, writing, and making memories. When I'm not busy I try to share my writings and drawing with DA cause it can be refreshing.

I'm here to write and draw how I feel about things. Such as dreams, love, pain, and thoughts.

Just here to be me. Draw thoughts that are in my head, sorry if you don't care for them.

Anyways I hope you enjoy my page. Stay Strong



Add a Comment:
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2017
Are things getting any better for you? If you don't mind me asking how are you making it right now?
Tx0x Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2017  Student Writer
Life is a challenge I will say that. Full of ups and downs. Nice quote
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2017
I'm glad you like it dude. Yea life is challenging but you seem to be doing a little better. I am happy for you. Even if things do not go your way though just live life to the fullest and do what you enjoy. Nobody's perfect so you should not get yourself down too much when you mess up. Just be positive and as long as you do not think of yourself as those who are putting you down then you can get through any challenge. Always good to chat with you my friend.
Tx0x Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2017  Student Writer
(: thanks
(1 Reply)
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2017
Here is another quote:
Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.
-Norman Vincent Peale
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2017
I want to give you an inspirational quote I saw that may help you get through this time:
Life is ten percent of what happens to you and ninty percent of how you react to it.
-Charles R. Swindoll
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2017
Hey dude how you been
Tx0x Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2017  Student Writer
I'm alive but things are a little stressful
myst9900 Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2017
Sorry to hear that. More family issues??
Tx0x Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2017  Student Writer
More like family disowned mr
(1 Reply)
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